Is Nextdoor the Next Great Dating App?

Lets face it. Dating apps are broken. Tinder, Bumble, Hinge and Farmer’s Only are great if you’re a girl trying to collect Venmos from rando simps and score free dinners. But as a dude, you have a better chance of finding toilet paper at the grocery store right now than you do matching with a girl you actually find attractive/vibe with. 

And if i’m being totally honest, with a profile like this:

I figured i’d be booked with dates and sexual escapades until mid to late 2030. But unfortunately that hasn’t been the case. Things were looking bleak.

But then I discovered Nextdoor, what I believe to be America’s next great dating app.

Nextdoor is an app that connects you with people in your neighborhood. Primarily a place for Karens to congregate and gossip about which store manager they all think should get fired next, the app also lets you join groups and make posts that other people in your hood can see. It is not TECHNICALLY a dating app. But I think it has a lot of potential to be one.

Here is a great example of how the app can be used to score dates:

While what this dude might not be something Hitch or Ryan Gosling would recommend, i’m sure you can find your own, creative ways to impress your neighborhood crush with a post of your own. Here’s what I did:

Sure, I might not get a date out of this, but now the girls in my neighborhood know that 1) i’m a tequila guy 2) I like to party and 3) i’m in to organic shit and therefore care about the environment. So it’s really only a matter of time before someone comes up to me at the neighborhood grocery store and asks to make out with me right?

Shooting your shot has never been easier fellas. Download this app ASAP. Its a quarantine essential.

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